When We Get Married…

Shortly after the election, Carey asked what Jazz and me would want our wedding to be like when we have one. I lost the draft post I created, but now that I’ve found it again, I thought I’d answer, seeing as our 2nd Anniversary is coming up :)

Yes, it's a little Twilight-inspired. Hush.
Yes, it’s a little Twilight-inspired. Hush.

I want to get married in a church. I’m not that religious, but I do respect Jazz’s family’s Catholicism, their priest is one of my most favorite people, and the inside of their church is just awe-inspiring. So I want to get married in there, BUT… I also want a ton of flowers and plants everywhere so it’s almost like nature came to the wedding too. I suppose I could be talked into the reception looking like that instead, but the ceremony would just have to coordinate.

These are just about perfect!
These are just about perfect!

My outfit… I’m pretty sure I know what that will be and it will be EPIC. Seriously, memorable. Think white tux with tails trailing behind me, sparkling like Elton John in the 70s, a tiara on my head — yep, I said it! — and I will have on a pair of white heels with so much shiny they could make you blind in the right lighting.

I want to look like an ice prince from a fairytale. A winter wedding would be fabulous.

Yes, I know. So gay I poop glitter.

White glitter. There’s a theme.


Jazz can wear whatever he wants. Really, so long as he shows up, I don’t care if he’s dressed like James Bond or Borat at the beach. OK not that much skin can show. If he’d like to be an ice prince too, that’s awesome. Pirate is also acceptable. Hold please because that right there deserves some daydreaming…

Whoo… OK, pirate’s good!

Alec has to wear his dress uniform, btw. I’ve seen it and totally get why Carter gets a little glassy-eyed whenever anyone mentions it. Alec’s Marine friends may also attend in uniform.

Oh crap. Now I want a sword.

So our vows… I’m not sure if I want us to write our own or take over the traditional vows and just work “husband and husband” into them. I mean, I’m not trying to make a statement or anything, but those words mean something about marriage and I want that. I want a marriage, not a gay marriage like there’s something different about it. I won’t be agreeing to “obey” — unless I’m going to share wedding night ideas — but traditional might be the way we go with vows.

cake topper
OK, that is so adorable.

The cake… Not sure there, but I do know there will probably be some smooshing of the cake in somebody’s face. So it has to taste good and have lots of frosting. Sparkly sugar stuff would be really great too. But I don’t care so much if it’s a big cake or a mound of cupcakes. Two grooms on top of something, of course, and one must be blond and fabulous.

Honeymoon. I’m a little stumped on that one. OK, no, I’m cheesy on that one: As long as I’m with Jazz, I don’t care where we are. Our first vacation together was camping. In a tent. With public showers. I figure, if I can do that and love it because we were together, it doesn’t matter where we end up on our honeymoon. A bed, of course, would be nice. Not bedroll.

So, yeah, those are my wedding plans!

Oh, on a serious note: I know we could do all of this any time we wanted to even though it wouldn’t be official in the eyes of our state. We don’t want to. When we get married, we’ll do the whole thing just like anyone else. That’s all there is to it. I look at it as a chance to save up for it a little longer because all those rhinestones and flowers and swords aren’t cheap!

41 thoughts on “When We Get Married…

  1. Pingback: Oh, shoes, how I adore thee… | Thorny, Not Prickly

  2. A beautiful, beautiful vision, Thorny . . . *sigh*

    Would Jazz’s church allow a gay wedding? I know there are lots of cool priests around, but I don’t think they can autonomously defy Church doctrine. :(


  3. Casey

    I love the plans so much I am not even gonna be mad that you got my name wrong ;) Lordy, I want to be at this wedding! I think that Jazz should have a crown and a sword! It could me like a ice prince and a dark prince! If you go for traditional vows, don’t mess it up and say “for richer or richer”, that will get you the stink eye from the priest! Oh and make sure that the cake in the face does NOT end up in your nose, can’t live picture down!


  4. Sounds like another great party you are planning, Thorny! I am sure it will be lovely. Be sure to be watching the Supreme Court. Maybe your chance to get married where you want will come soon…


  5. Carey

    I LOVE IT! Sounds really great Thorny, I am definitely a cupcake person not a cake person so I vote for that! Whatever you do it will be special, it’s your big day :)


  6. I have faith in you & Jazz, my friends, I know you will get the day you always dreamed of.

    PS: Just a side note, every time I come to your blog it freezes my computer – (not sure if the glitch is on my end or yours – but it only happens on your blog). Not that it will stop me from visiting.


    1. NJ, if you use Chrome, I know WordPress has been a little glitchy with that lately. They said they got everything worked out, but sometimes it makes my browser hang for a few seconds too.


    1. 007mc

      Because I couldn’t help it – google ‘wedding swords.’ Many are about a sword arch, but there is apparently a custom of ‘wedding cake swords’ used to cut the cake. I just hope there isn’t much drinking going on before that happens.

      I was going to say something suggestive about both of you and swords, but this is too sweet a post to sully that way.


  7. Monika

    Oh Thorny! *sniff* it all sounds so wonderful *sniff* You are definitely going to have to have tissue handy, if just reading your post has me teary I can’t imagine what the actual wedding would have me doing. *sniff*

    It all sounds so special and beautiful but the one thing that will be the most beautiful is seeing all the love that you and Jazz share, that’s going to make the ceremony shine!

    Hope you get your special day soon. :-D


  8. And what a truly beautiful wedding it will be, Thorny! That just sounds all kinds of *le sigh*
    White and black tuxes, those wicked shoes, bringing nature inside… And yeah, don’t forget the kleenex. (((((hugs))))

    I’m sending out all the vibes I have for Ohio, and the rest of the country, to get with the times so you can have your ice prince dream sooner rather than later. Hopefully on your third anniversary. :-)


  9. Alder

    It’s going to be a beautiful day regardless of flowers and clothes, because you and Jazz will just be shining with happiness!

    But there’s just one thing I want to ask – you say “there will probably be some smooshing of the cake in somebody’s face.” Er, what? Is this a custom at American weddings? :)


  10. Susan

    Oh Thorny. What a beautiful picture you have painted. I, too, see Jazz in a black tux and even a black silk shirt and tie to offset your gorgeous silver prince attire. And Alec in uniform…sigh. Hope you get everything you wish for — and soon! :)


  11. Sounds amazing and I hope it’s everything you want it to be. But a word of advice on the shoes; make sure you have flats to change into at the reception. The shoes in that picture are not going to be dancing friendly for very long!


  12. Sunshine, I can totally picture it! The guests have spent the last 10 minutes drooling over the pirate and his crew and the gorgeous men in uniform. Then the ice prince sweeps in. A gasp runs the church and everyone stands, dazed by his beauty and glitter. Sounds fabulous! And definately a day worth waiting for. :) (You’ll have to post pictures!)


  13. Oh Thorny, that sounds just absolutely wonderful, and I sincerely hope that you and Jazz will be able to make your dreams come true in the not too distant future. In the meantime keep loving and cherishing each other and save up for your future fantabulous wedding.

    I’m not gay myself but I wholeheartedly support everybody’s right to marry their beloved whether in a church or in a civil ceremony, straight or gay, and I live in a country where same-sex marriages are legal and (in the eyes of the law) equal to traditional marriages, although currently it’s up to the individual priest whether he/she will perform the church wedding ceremony or not. Those against it are (thankfully) getting fewer every year.


  14. amanda2u

    Well first of all the whole idea is completely fabulous! You would look deeeeevine as an ice prince. Not to mention I’m sure Jazz would die just seeing how beautiful you looked. Secondly I love how honest you are with this. “Poops glitter” that had me rolling like you wouldn’t believe. And finally those shoes are just fierce! Love it! I will be praying that your day comes soon. I mean you two are already married in every other sense of the word. And make sure you save invites for us! :)


  15. Whatever your final vision is, I hope you get to do it soon. (I’m thinking Jazz in a dark tux might be a sight worth walking down the aisle for.) Until then, I hope you have fun with the fantasy planning. When it happens, in addition to a church full of smiling teary-eyed people, you’ll have hundreds more you’ve never met cheering for you.


  16. Beautiful. And with all of us (and there are so many of us) thinking good thoughts, and the world finally shifting to the right course of action, hopefully it will be all the sooner.

    By the way, you forgot an important element…lots and lots of Kleenex, cunningly hidden around the church. There won’t be a dry eye in the house.



  17. That sounds like quite a fitting and fabulous celebration! I can totally see it. And I have no doubt that before to long, you’ll be able to do it. Things are changing, even if its slow. Till then, it’s nice to dream…and save!


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