Reality in Sexual Fantasy

I was emailing with Kris — who was kind enough to take me up on that offer to chat more from Available Alec — and got to talking about her stories. She was interested in my honest opinion on all of it…but especially on the accuracy of the sex. Anymore, that just makes me smile. You girls, nervous about getting the sex right. It’s not that difficult.

But maybe it is, because I still run into plenty of stories where some poor guy is getting pounded four times in a row while standing on his head and doing a split. Alright, not really–and that’s not a request to try writing that, you hear me?–but it gets close sometimes. So maybe there is some need out there for a chat about reality in sexual fantasy.

I’m going to start by sharing some reality about me and Carter. Don’t worry, he knows and I have his permission to share this.

He’d never been with a man before me, so his ass was virgin territory. And here’s the thing, it was 7 times of trying before I got all the way into him. So right there is something to keep in mind if your character’s a virgin: it doesn’t always work the first time out. He’s tight, it hurts, enthusiasm drops, worries crop up, and it’s just not going to happen. Yeah, it’s hotter if your character’s writhing on that dick like he just discovered his life’s purpose. But it’s more realistic for them to stop, good try, and do something else that brings them that much closer to each other. Not saying you have to, just saying think about it.

Another thing to consider is not every gay guy does anal. Some never do. If I think about it, I can see how some might not want to, and it doesn’t have to be because of bad experiences. Some don’t like fingers up their ass–or putting theirs up someone else’s–so it’s conceivable that they wouldn’t want anything else up there either. If Carter wasn’t willing to keep trying, I would’ve been fine with that because he was absolutely acing everything else, no problem. Not wanting one type sex isn’t the end of a relationship (though it can be the end of a no-names hook-up if that’s what you’re hunting for). The point being, f your character’s don’t do it, I’m pretty sure we’ll live.

So what did I think of Kris’s sex scenes? She got it right. She got it real too.

DrFeelgoodLGFrom Hero Worship by Kris T. Bethke:

Slowly, he pushed himself in. The instant he made it past the outer ring, I shoved my hips back to take the whole length of him.

It was too fast. My eyes watered for a minute at the pain, but he stayed completely still and rubbed my back. Apparently having his cock in my hand had not given me a good enough gauge as to how long and wide he was. I wiggled, trying to accommodate him. Within a few seconds, the pain morphed into something so much better. I pulled away a little, then thrust myself back onto him. I moaned low in my throat.

See that? Alex is eager, a little too eager, and that hurts. But Matt does some good stuff with the back rub. That works because it’s a soothing sensation that helps those muscles relax, but it also lets Alex know Matt’s not impatient for him to let him in already. Alex taking charge of the penetration after that is great too because he’s the one who knows when he’s really ready, right?And then it gets good.

Realism while still being sexy and that’s what matters to me. Yes, I know, YMMV. That’s cool. Do what you want. But I’m going to smile when you worry. ;-)

OMG Look What I Did

So something happened on Sunday. It was a little unexpected. I mean, I knew it was coming, but I didn’t realize it was THAT close to actually happening. And then I debated whether I wanted to announce it yet. It’s early stages now, there’s still a lot of work left, but… Well, I’m about to burst and I can’t contain it!

I’ve written a book.

SPLINTERS is finished.

Woodstock's SO HAPPY

Drawn by LC Chase per Mary Grzesik’s request

I totally did that when I wrote THE END Sunday night. More than one graceful tear, though, because I’m me and that’s what I do. I’m a weeper :)

Today, I’m reading a printed copy and marking it up as I find things I want to fix or expand on. Jazz also has a copy. Once we’re both done, I’ll make some changes and then quietly panic for a few minutes.

Because then it’ll be time for me to send SPLINTERS’ rough draft out to my critique partners. {whimpers} No, it’ll be fine. I’m not bad at this. I’ll be fine. OMG…

I wrote a BOOK :)

Splinters Snippet

I’m sure it’s not a secret that someone in this story carted Al out in a field and tied him up, so I feel this part can be shared without causing horrible spoilers. I have censored it a tiny bit to keep a little mystery intact, though.

Duke stands at the bottom of the stairs. “Al, please listen to me. I did not have anything to do with what–”

“Really? Because she did.” I stop on the stairs, glaring down at him. “I bet she’s actually in serious trouble for her part. Is it aiding and abetting? Accessory to kidnapping?” I stomp down to get in his face. “And if you think I’m not pressing charges against her, you’re–”

He throws up his hands. “She’s not me!”

I shove his shoulders, but he barely sways. “How do I know you wouldn’t lie to protect him too?”

His expression goes stone cold. “Because I want to hunt him down for what he did to you.”

We stare at each other, the both of us fuming…but for different reasons. I can see it now. I stare into those hazel eyes as his face relaxes and I see all his pain. Again, I want to run away with him until the world makes sense again. My face heats and my eyes burn. Duke touches me then, strokes my cheek, and his expression softens. I let him caress me. I just let him as the fight leaves me.

Then he whispers, “Especially when I know it’s my fault he went after you at all.”

My heart seems to squeeze in my chest. “What?”

“He asked how I could ever be attracted to a man, and I showed him a photo of you in the paper that said you were in Dallas.” He swallows hard. “I’m so sorry. I told him how to get to you.”

Only because his face is so open, so clearly showing me his guilt and devastation, do I stay where I am. I don’t blame Duke. Others have amends to make, but I don’t blame Duke for coming out with a visual aid.

I gulp and then admit, “I’m scared alright? You might not have done anything wrong, but–”

“I know.”

I whisper and it hurts, “I can’t stay here, Duke.”

Now he’s too choked up to voice it, but his lips silently repeat that he knows.

Writing the scenes of their time apart has been where this story has gotten interesting for me. I’m worried it’s going to be that lagging middle and make people groan or skip ahead to the reunion because I feel like I’m slogging through it.

But I also feel like, hey, write everything down and we’ll see what stays later.

Rest assured, though, that I’m doing this thing. This is the year of Splinters!

Happy Holidays, Slutty McSlutterson

Toasty warm and decadent like melted chocolate on your tongue, Thorny sighs and relaxes on top of his husband. He should get up, wash off, but he’s in a very satiated place right now and he doesn’t much care if they get glued together. He’s going to bask.

Winter sex might just be his favorite. Hot on one side, chilly on the other, and his skin just feels extra alive because of that. Jazz does the post-coital petting thing all over Thorny with his slightly rough hands — adding to the lovely feelings — but he’s making noises like he’s still coming. Groaning, gasping, and the bed’s rocking…

Wait a minute. That’s not Jazz and it’s not their bed.

Thorny lifts his head and does a slow, horrified pan over to the OTHER BED and the OTHER COUPLE in this room. They’re in Michigan and sharing a room with Alec and Carter! Thorny sucks in a cold breath and his eyeballs freeze this moment into his brain without permission. He manages to tear his gaze away and look down at his husband again.

Jazz smirks at him. “Did you forget…where we are?” he asks breathlessly.

Thorny involuntarily looks again at the other bed, the men there and… The roll of hips, the noises, the way Carter’s got his fingers laced with Alec’s against the pillow and their mouths are fused together…

Holy hell, they’re over there having SEX!

Like he and Jazz just did!

While they were all in the same room!

Did they just have group sex? Was it an orgy? It was something like that, that’s for damn sure. IS something like that because Alec and Carter aren’t finished yet.

“Oh. My. God,” Thorny whispers and sinks down until his face is mushed into Jazz’s shoulder. Continue reading

GUEST POST & GIVEAWAY: Transgression by Theo Fenraven


Why does an author known for writing m/m books suddenly decide to create a story around a main character who’s transgender?

Because she was yelling at me, that’s why. I’d wake up in the middle of the night, and she’d be whispering seductively in my ear. I’d be riding around on the scooter, and she’d be leaning against my back, talking talking talking.

It wasn’t as if I didn’t have other projects started, either. I’m several pages into my first YA novel. I had a brilliant idea for yet another story just a few days ago. And during a bout of insomnia the other night, I wrote the first three paragraphs of what may turn into a short story.

But Sky wouldn’t let up. “Put me first,” she purred in her low voice. “You won’t be sorry.”

So the research began, because I know nothing about the world of transgenders. I quickly became immersed.

You’d think she’d shut up at this point, right? Not at all. If anything, she got pushier, and after you meet her, you’ll realize a pushy Sky is the most wonderful thing ever. She gives me the look, and that’s it. I melt. I’d do anything for her.

As it happens, Zachary Fox, the other main character, feels exactly the same way about her.  “Instalove” is so cliché, but when these two collide, I believed it. They’d been waiting for each other a long time.

Some of you may think, “This isn’t for me. I have no interest in these characters,” but they have a story to tell, and what it comes down to is we all want and need to love and be loved, and that starts with accepting yourself.

Don’t we all doubt ourselves? Don’t we all wonder how anyone could love us, warts and all? But it happens every day, and it’s no less a miracle because of that.

Straight, gay, bisexual, trans, intersex, asexual, queer: the alphabet soup that has become so familiar to us these last few years. Transgression deals with half the letters, and I hope I wrote it in such a way that anyone can relate to these characters. Like us, they are struggling to accept themselves, each other, and find love along the way.

I’m proud of this story, and if you read it, I hope you’ll let me know what you thought.

Transgression by Theo Fenraven

Transgression by Theo FenravenZachary Fox can’t sleep.

His acting career is taking off. Public recognition is picking up. Now more than ever, he understands how key reputation is to his success. But his relationship with his co-star, Kris — arranged around publicity rather than genuine feelings — is suffocating him. She once understood his needs, but her demands are beginning to grate with every shrill order she gives.

Zach has a secret. The breakout star of a new medical series, he’s been hiding his orientation from co-stars, friends and family, the studio, and his fans.

On the recommendation of a friend, Zach seeks out Sky Kelly, a well-connected herbalist whose concoctions are natural magic, as is her stunning beauty. On the surface, she has it all: her own house, a thriving business, and good friends, but the things she had to do to get there are a time bomb ticking away, and when it goes off, she’ll be teetering on the edge of a chasm that can put her right back where she started.

Sky has secrets. Like, she’s got a Y chromosome and the original equipment to go with it. Like being a highly paid escort. Like, if Zach is seen with her in public, it could ruin his career. Like someone becoming so obsessed with Sky, that obsession threatens them both.

Secrets… everyone is hiding something, and instead of finding The One, it could be The End.


Zach didn’t realize how drunk he was until he left the club and tried to get into the car. His foot slipped off the running board twice, and he stopped, swaying slightly, looking at his friend over the top of the vehicle.

“Can’t drive, Andy.” He closed the door and leaned against it. “What shape are you in?”

Grinning, Andy came around to the driver’s side. “Better than you, by far.” He opened the door. “Get in, slide over, and open the window in case you need to puke.”

Laughing, Zach crawled in, climbed clumsily over the center console, and collapsed in the passenger seat. “Not gonna puke. I never puke.”

Andy got behind the wheel, inserted the key, and started the car. “Bullshit. What about the time we were at that party in the Hills? You know, last summer.”

“Sarah’s birthday? Oh, yeah, I did kind of lose it that night, didn’t I?” Slipping down onto his tailbone, he propped his sneakered feet on the dash, bracing himself against movement.

Snorting, Andy merged into traffic. “The inside of that car had to be cleaned twice.”

Zach giggled. “Sorry. Promise! No upchucking tonight.”

“Hey, I don’t give a shit. It’s your car.”

They drove to Santa Monica Boulevard. It was a chilly night with a light breeze. Zach wished he could see the stars, but the light pollution was so bad, nothing in the heavens was visible.

“You were hitting the liquor hard. What’s up?”

Zach was still peering up through the windshield, trying to see anything other than the light umbrella over the city. “Can’t sleep lately. I thought it might help.”

Andy shook his head. “No, no, you pass out on liquor, but then you’re awake again a few hours later.”

Leaning back in the seat, he glanced at his friend. “Then what do you suggest?”

“I know someone who can fix you right up. You don’t have anything against natural herbs and stuff, do you?”

“Herbs are good. Minimal side effects, right?”

“Right. I know someone.” He pulled into the right-hand turn lane at the next light. “Ever heard of Sky?”

Zach burst into laughter. “What, that stuff over our heads? Supposed to be blue but is often a dirty gray? Yeah, I have a passing familiarity with it.”

“Asshole. I’m talking about a person. Sky is sort of the unofficial herbalist in this town. Does her own distillations and mixtures, sells them to whoever wants them. Also happens to read palms, and I swear to god, she’s psychic. The real thing, not like those twits who talk to you over the phone for five bucks a minute.” He turned left, then right again, driving into Laurel Canyon. “She told me the woman I was seeing a few months ago was shagging someone else, and I found out a week later she was.”

Zach rolled his eyes. “In this town, everyone is shagging everyone else. That’s not prescience, it’s a fact.”

“Fine, don’t believe me, but she can fix you up with something that will help you sleep naturally. I’m taking you there now.”

Zach sat up and looked out the window. “It’s after eleven. Isn’t that a strange time of night to call on a lady?”

“She keeps late hours,” Andy assured him, taking out his cell. “I’ll call her, though, make sure she’s cool with it. You always call Sky before you visit.”


He sketched a shrug. “It’s one of her rules. I figure she’s protecting her clients. I mean, who in this town wants people to know you get your fortune read, right? It’s ringing.”

Andy drove one-handed while Zach leaned his head against the window, watching the city lights stream by. No one would care if people knew you got your fortune read. That was Hollywood.

He was nicely buzzed and feeling very good: his series was on hiatus for the next two weeks, giving him a much-needed break. He was leaving for Sydney on vacation the next day, and Kris was going with him, but that was okay. She understood how things worked. She wouldn’t get in the way.

After Australia, he’d visit his parents in New York City. That meant more fun. He smiled. Zach had the greatest life ever, and he knew it.

“… We’re about twenty minutes away,” Andy was saying. He listened for a moment. “Nope, won’t stay long. Thanks, Sky.” He ended the call. “All set. She has another appointment after, so we’ll have to make it quick.”

“Sure.” Zach pulled his long legs up on the seat and wrapped his arms around them while his blood fizzed with alcohol. He was determined the next couple of weeks be an adventure. Tonight was the kick-off.

Buy Links:

All Romance Books (ARe):  Available in ePub, mobi, and PDF

Amazon:  Kindle format

Barnes & Noble: ePub format