June 12, 2013 14 Comments
We argue. I know it might seem like Jazz and me get along so famously we’re damn near perfect, but nope, we argue. Sometimes silently and sometimes loudly, but it happens every now and then. Our main goal then is to work it out, whatever it is, before bed so there’s no going to sleep angry. So far, we’ve managed to achieve that every time.
Besides, it’s really hard to stay mad at someone you end up cuddling during the night like a teddy bear. And then there’s not being able to sleep without being the teddy bear.
I used to be terrified of arguing with Jazz. I’d back down and agree because I was afraid that, if I didn’t, he’d leave. Then he got mad at me for doing that. And I got mad back because I didn’t know what I was supposed to do. He was all fight with me, express your opinion, change my mind. You won’t leave? God no. Fine then, you’re being a jerk, you’re completely wrong, and here’s why… I don’t back down anymore unless I realize I’m the one who’s wrong. The making up is way better when you’re all amped up too
Lately, I’ve noticed a lot of songs coming on the radio about breaking up or trying not to. These make sense to me way more now than they did when I was single. I didn’t like them then. Probably because I’d never been that hurt by a breakup or really had to consider one. Now I totally get every word. Bruno Mars wishing he’d done more and then offering up advice to the one who has the love now? OMG ouch and I definitely don’t want to be him.
But the one by Pink with Nate Ruess? Change my mind, give me any little thing, and I’ll keep sticking around? Oh, yeah. I get that one too. Everyone worries they’re not enough for their partner. I sure do. But every little thing Jazz does, especially the ones he doesn’t seem aware of, that show he picks me over everyone else out there makes me want to stay. He’ll watch a girl or guy walk by, and I’ve got that evil voice asking what they have that I don’t. Then he’ll reach across the table and play with my fingers while he reads through the menu. Those people are mannequins in a window, just scenery, and I’m the one who matters.
So even if we’re yelling at each other or fuming in separate rooms, there will be a little thing that draws us back together and makes us work through the issue.
And then we make up like bunnies